You wake up smothered by the close air. The food you eat is always cold. The train, always too crowded and the bus is never on time. Work pushes you hard as you wonder why he never calls you on time. You close your eyes, but no sleep at all. Walks two miles everyday just to have lunch next to the person you says is the one. Inocent lies. Inocent kisses. Watches tv. Learns how a lawn-mower is fabricated. You says it's intersting. Pull a chat. He smiles all the time. You think about him back to work and you think about him when you go home. Buys the same snack. Study is lame. Drawing is boring. "Fun is too expensive this days", you think. No car, no money. You might get a good news on the phone. You might call him back to celebrate. Barely eat. You contorces of stomachache and no one notices. You look awfull and decides to have a new hair cut. Have a new jacket. Those shoes you've seen yesterday. Change your glasses. Paint your nails. Expend the money you don't have. Kill for it. Have the life you aspire for a couple of hours, perhaps days. Die for it. You feel gorgeous, you feel vulnerable and sleeping gets harder although you have time to do stuff. Stuff your mind with words. Stuff your brain with memories, nostalgie. Past compunction. Remorse. Fears. Write something. Wonder about it. Get mad at world and go take a bath. Water is never hot as it should. Clean your face. You cry. You know why you cry. Clean your tears. Call him goodnight and smiles again. Pretends the world got a little better and finally go to sleep in a close air room.
With love to irony.